To speak or not to speak......

At this time of year, hopefully, we take the time to appreciate all the little things in our lives. Three of those things for me are my children and even though I complain here and there, I am thankful.

I am thankful for the life that I have been given and for all that has been provided for me. I am thankful for my loving friends and family and I am thankful that so far..... my kids have kept the straight and narrow (or so I believe).

Like many of you, I have waited in anticipation for this period in my life, where I would have the "dreaded" teenager, but so far I've been spared the heartache and frustration that seems to plaque these teenage years.

As parents we all try very hard to make sure we raise our children the right way. We give them opportunities we never had. We buy them things we never dreamed of. We encourage them with love and support, helping them when they fall and praising them when they succeed.

But let me ask you this....how well do we really know them? These mini-mes.... these carbon copies of us?

I have always prided myself in thinking that I "know" my daughter and that she would never do anything wrong. I also thought that all my friends enjoyed this same type of security  -- of "knowing" what our kids were up to. However, recent events have shattered this apparent false sense of security and now I find myself in strange waters.

So let me pose a question to you....

If you found out (from your daughter) that a friend's child has not followed the path of the straight and narrow and has engaged in inappropriate behaviors, would you tell her?

Would you say something, knowing that the child has already been deemed by her peers as wanton and licentious?

Would you say something, knowing that by doing so, you are also breaking the trust and confidence that your daughter has placed in you?

Or......

Would you hold your tongue?

I have asked this question to some of my friends and I find people falling into two categories.

One group feels that since the events occurred in the past, I should leave it alone and hope that the child is now in a better place. They feel that by divulging the "secret" at this point in time, there is no upside. I could potentially incur the wrath of my friend (because she may not believe me), cause a rift between my friend and her child, destroy my daughter's friendship and in the end I could also lose the trust and confidence my own daughter has placed in me and cause us to drift apart.

The other group feels that I should say something no matter the cost, while trying to minimize the potential backlash towards my daughter and hope that all will work out.

What are your thoughts?

Have you ever found yourself in this situation? If so, what did you do?

How would you feel if this were your child?

Three for Me

Yes, I'm still here.....I haven't totally fallen off the planet...I've just been in Orlando with the family on a much needed vacation. Although I haven't been able to post "posts", I have been able to keep up with the A to Z challenge and the NaPoWriMo Challenge, although it's been a bit difficult......try composing poems in the midst of roller coaster screams, slurping of Butter Beer and being totally and completely drenched on the River Adventure ride....hmpff...they said "you may get wet or possibly soaked"....possibly?!

Anyhow, we are nearing the end of our trip and I have a few things I wanted to get out before I end this week.

So, the Three for Me this week are:

1. High School "acceptance" letter? - My oldest daughter has worked very hard over the years and as she entered 8th grade, she applied to the County magnet school. This school is considered to be a top notch high school and many kids apply....in fact, out of the 1550 applicants, only 280 will be granted entry. Of course, as luck would have it, and after a grueling application process, they decided to mail the "acceptance" letters out this week. Hello.....we are on Spring break. UGH! Luckily, my wonderful friend checked the mail for me on a daily basis and when it finally arrived, she expressed mailed it to us in Florida.

What did it say? Well, my daughter didn't want to open it until we were all together as a family, which meant we had the letter in hand for over half an hour before opening it. We trekked back into Universal Studio, located the rest of the clan and......

And she cried tears of joy....

YES! She got in. We are so happy for her and so very proud. Job well done geeky nerd....way to go!

2. Lost & Found - Ok, so you might be thinking what could possibly top an acceptance letter to an amazing high school, well.....if you read my poem from the other day, you will know that I experienced what all parents fear....losing their child in the crowd. So, the second thing I'm loving this week is finding Squid and having all three of my children. I came with three....thank God I'm leaving with three....I love you guys and next time, we are all wearing matching neon tops!

3. Harry Potter Land - I'm loving the fact that we are on vacation someplace warm and to top it off, we got to visit Harry Potter Land (twice). I love Harry Potter.....we got dizzy on the rides, purchased our wands from Ollivander's Wand Shop, bought a whole bunch of stuff in Hogsmeade and we had our fill of delicious Butter Beer. Here's to you Harry.

What Hogwarts house are you?

What are you loving this week?

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Three for Me

This has been a busy week for me and I am just filled with excitement and energy! Energy?!

Crazy for someone who sleeps too late and is up too early (at least according to me). Anyhow, enough with my ramblings....

Here are the Three for Me this week:

1. My darling daughter (a.k.a. Squid) - This one is loving the stage. She recently play Bonnie Bones from a pirate play and she had the whole theatre laughing. In one scene she is scolding the children and my friend turns to me and says, "Wow, she's good. Sounds just like you." Yes, I admit it. I do sound like a crazy pirate when I'm yelling at the kids...how else am I getting them to listen! 

As you can see in one of the shots, Bonnie Bones bites the bucket and like any good actor, my daughter falls down and then with a dramatic flair twitches her arm and leg to signify the finality of dear old cursed Bonnie Bones! Great job to my darling Squid and her fellow cast mates and teachers! Arghhhhhh!!!!!

2. New Camera Tip - I was surfing the net and I found a whole bunch of wonderful photographers who share their tips of the trade to novice photographers such as myself. I love playing around with my camera....my kids often joke and say"is there anything you won't take a picture of?" Anyhow, I learned a trick from Kristi at Live and Love Out Loud on how to take a macro image without purchasing another lens.....the only major drawback for me is that I'm one of those types that gets motion sick from the tiniest of movements.....so after this little camera trick, I was nauseous for about an hour...need to get myself an tri-pod.

Not the best, but I'm still learning

3. Reese's Peanut Butter Easter Eggs!!!!!! I need someone to take these away! I've devoured a whole bag.....I purposely hid them amongst the Hersey's chocolate eggs, but that didn't stop me. I would just dig and dig till I found one. So yummy. What's your favorite?

heaven........

Have a wonderful weekend! My kids are off tomorrow and I've got family coming.....so I've got to get off my bum and get ready.

You know, I'm going to go right over to that jar and grab me some Reese's PB eggs.....ciao!

A-Hem.....A-Hem...Your Skirt is Too Short!

Don't look now, but have you taken a good look at the length or lack of length in the clothing that young girls are wearing these days?

Courtesy of Samantha Villagran

I love fashion and I think it's a great way to express yourself, but when you are thirteen or fourteen years old, there has got to be some limitations. Don't you think?

Last year, I attended an event where the father of the birthday girl commented on the inappropriate attire that their guest were wearing. A sea of crazy heels, strapless tops, short dress...and a constant battle between adjusting and readjusting filled the room. He mimicked the girls.... as they desperately pulled their dresses up to keep it from falling only to shimmy it down to cover their tushies... Ridiculous was the only word he could mutter.

For those of you who have children in middle school and high school, I'm sure that you have heard parents whispering in corners.....look at that dress....it's soooo short....she can't even walk in those shoes.....oh my God, would you let your daughter wear that....

Would you?

How do you tell your daughter "No", when all her friends are wearing short party dresses and 5 inch heels that they can barely walk in? (UGH....one of my biggest pet peeves is seeing a woman wobble her way across the room....it's so unattractive....)

I really honestly don't know what the answer is, but I think that we need to sit these girls down and have a serious talk.

So girls, listen up!

You're young and beautiful. Be confident in who you are. Don't parade yourself around in short skirts and high heels, thinking your all that.....cause honestly, it's back firing.....you're giving off the wrong signals. Be classy......leave something to be desired. Don't give it all away at first glance, because they won't be coming back for more.......or if they do, it's not for who you are as a person.

Too harsh? Maybe....but it drives me nuts to see these young girls primping themselves up as if they are these sexual creatures ready for the picking....and I don't care if they're wearing this designer dress or that designer dress....women and girls are different....what might be appropriate for us is just not appropriate for them.

I'm not a "hater"...I know where I am in my life and I embrace it wholeheartedly, flabby tummy, wrinkles and all (and to my girlfriends out there, if you ever catch me wearing an outfit that is TOO young for me - tell me!).

I'm just sad.....

...sad to see the beauty and innocence of young women fall victim to society's depiction of what is considered "attractive".

How do you feel about this? Do you think that society and the media have skewed the perception of beauty for young women? Have they under-minded our daughters and and shaken their self confidence? What's the solution?

Before I started writing this post, I had discuss this topic with a good friend of mine and she sent me this message that was posted by a friend of hers:

I see more and more girls & ladies who have one thing missing that they should never lose... what is it? Class. Agree? Be classy girls, keep your standards up there. Be hard to get. Accept nothing but the best for you. You are worth it. And ladies... just picture a classy gal in your head, look up the word and strive for that. It's a good thing.

I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels this way.

I believe that we as women and mothers, should unite and firmly stand our ground. Let's not let our daughters measure their self worth by their hemline.

And girls, know this.....you deserve only the best....don't lower yourself and your standards, instead, raise them and rise above them.

Be strong.......Be classy......Be girls.

It is a good thing.

Courtesy of Ignacioleo Leonardi